The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
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Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
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I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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