The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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