Kiss
Puke
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
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Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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