oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
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