He asked to "fluff my boner.."
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
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So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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