He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
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