My hair reeks of homosexuality.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize