i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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