i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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