There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize