u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
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