Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
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he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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