I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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