Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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