I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
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