that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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