She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize