If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize