After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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