Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
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We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
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Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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