I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
It's not a walk of shame if you run
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize