Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Randomize