I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
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