I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
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