Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize