I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
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he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
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What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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