I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
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She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
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My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
You ever have a fart follow you around?
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