I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
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