dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's just so happy...and so naked.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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