I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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