we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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