he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I think your dad took our porno
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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