idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize