What did we do last night that was yellow?
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
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