Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize