please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
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