I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
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