o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
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