the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
they're like a gay fantastic four
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
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i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
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wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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