i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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