you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
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Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
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He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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