I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
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btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
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Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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