she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
i think i have herpe
just one?
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Randomize