nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize