Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
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I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
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I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
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