tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
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