the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
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