Ambien. No doubt about it.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize