I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize