I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize